All Alone Am I...

Way back in 1963...the year I graduated from New Carlisle High School...Brenda Lee recorded a song that included these lyrics:
All alone am I ever since your goodbye
All alone with just a beat of my heart
People all around but I don't hear a sound
Just the lonely beating of my heart.

All alone...
With just the lonely beating of my heart.

Now that's alone.
Try it...try just being alone...in silence...and listen for that internal sound of "just the lonely beating of your heart."

What do you "hear" beyond the sound of your heartbeat?
What thoughts come to mind...in the absence of the usual background din of everyday life in 21st century America?

Do you "hear" what you couldn't hear before you sat in the (relative) silence?
What thoughts are you having now that you are concentrating on just your heartbeat?

Pretty heavy stuff, this.

Scary...maybe.
Instructive...maybe.

Do you have any sense of peace?
Do events, or the faces of friends come into "view?"
Are you making plans for what will happen when you finish this session of silence. or are you letting this time...and this place...and this experience "speak to you" words that cannot otherwise be spoken?

Well, those are as far as my thoughts take me in this vein...but here are the words of Michele Casella Collier...a lady I know through a FaceBook connection...to me, she is known as "The Yoga Lady," but as you will see in what follows, she has gifts beyond her skill in doing and teaching Yoga.  Her poem is titled "In Stillness."



In stillness
in the silent
expanse
between
the stars
there is
the peace
once lost
now found
and it comes
in quiet calm
that reaches
down
into the space
between
flesh
and bone



Breathing in
Breathing out
it is there
in stillness
where
wholeness
empties
into infinity
and gently floats
in between
each breath
and waits
in stillness
for the soul's
remembrance
and surrender
into the soft
elegant radiance
and fullness
of eternity

Nothing...it ain't easy!

I retired.
I retired at age 70.
I retired after having held some kind of job...either full-time...or part-time while attending college and/or Grad School...since age 18.  The final 41 years of employment were as a pastor or administrator in the United Methodist Church.
I retired as of June 30, 2015.

I now do nothing.
And it ain't easy.

I read two articles on how doing nothing helps one get things done.  Those articles were just nonsensical.  Nothing to them, really.

There is a bit of guilt associated with doing nothing...instead of doing something...but it can be easily overcome if one knows how.

Borrowing the good suggestions of others...and maybe throwing in some of my own thoughts...I have come up with some things I can be doing...or practicing...while I am working out the details of this doing nothing thing.

Here goes.

Even while doing nothing...I can:

Live and Let Live.

Be Positive instead of Negative.

Reflect on the Lessons that Losing offers.

Spend some Time Alone Every Day.

Be Open to Change.

Practice the Presence of Silence.

Live in the Moment.

Advocate for Peace.

Proceed Calmly with Life.

Do No Harm.

And of course...Develop a Healthy Sense of Leisure.

Truth...

I admit two things about what follows:
I have often wondered just how much of what we think we know about the Jesus story is anywhere near the truth of the Jesus story...and,
I don't think those closest to Jesus in real life knew what the truth of the Jesus story was (almost) anymore than folks in our time and place do.

And so, I wonder if someday we will unearth written documents that go something like this:



Just a few short weeks ago, the man named Jesus was killed on a cross outside the city wall of Jerusalem. This is not rumor nor fantasy, it is true. Yet, while he is gone, he remains the hope of those who were his closest friends and followers. 
Many in Jerusalem and perhaps in some nearby villages and towns, are reportedly heartbroken.
Too much has happened to fully explain, let alone fully understand. Almost none of it makes sense.
No doubt there will be reports spreading that he was a fool, a liar, a flim-flam man.  There is no doubt that what he spoke of and what he promised has all gone, all disappeared.

Many of those who were in Jesus' inner circle are now being hunted by the authorities. If they are not all caught and dealt the same death sentence as Jesus, they will most likely have to lay low for the foreseeable future.  No doubt they will have some great stories to tell about their three years of being in his company. 
If Jesus' message is to be believed, these followers will probably defend and promote his life through living peaceably and lovingly wherever life takes them. The truth is that almost all that is known about the man named Jesus is that he cared little for what others believed to be true, but cared supremely for what he believed God declared to be true: That loving others was the only way forward.

Stuff I Shoulda Known Sooner...and Said More Often

For 41 years I delivered sermons from pulpits and spoke in leadership roles of various sorts...leading workshops and training events , addressing district and conference meetings, answering questions in official settings, etc.

It came with the job.  Pastor/Preacher.  Executive Director of an Urban Ministry agency. District Superintendent.

There are some stories to tell.  I made some genuine flubs.  I said some funny stuff (not always meaning it to be funny...it just came out that way).  I might have spoken some wise words on occasion. 

These last six years of serving a local church...after serving in administrative roles for the previous 16 years...have left me with some regrets that I could have spoken more wisely and more directly in my younger years.  In fact I now find that there was Stuff I Should Known Sooner...and Said More Often.

But, I didn't know it sooner and did not say it often enough.

With age comes wisdom.  Here is some of the stuff I shoulda known sooner...and said more often:

-Don't settle for skimming the surface of life...all the Good Stuff is below that.
-This world is a very tough place...tougher than you think.
-Each of us is pretty much like all the rest of us...in some very significant ways.
-That Kingdom Jesus spoke about is now (and always was) within us.
-God is a living mystery...never anything less.
-If it ain't patient, it ain't love.
-From Here-to-There just may be the longest, hardest journey we will ever take.
-Serendipity could turn spiritual in unguarded moments.
-"In-Between" is one of the most gnarly, dark places in life.
-God is always...or at the very least, almost always...at work among us.
-Our ideas about God and Life are too small...seriously, way too small.
-Our doubts and fears about God and Life are too big...seriously, way too big.
-We must love like our lives depend on it...because they do.
-Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning.
-If we take new paths, there will be new possibilities.
-The four actions of God that may best describe the Divine One are these: God Creates, God Loves, God Redeems, God Continues.

There's other Stuff...I may get to a recounting of that at another time.

Times Change - Life moves On

The countdown is almost at an end.  My final Sunday as a pastor under appointment by a Bishop is this weekend.  We've already moved into the home we purchased for retirement.

We are remaining in (what a good friend calls) The Peoples Democratic Republic of Bloomington.  The southside...near the Country Club...and a large Middle School...on the edge of an old limestone quarry.  

Whatever comes next is just around the corner for us.

I get a chance to personally welcome the pastor who is appointed to serve at St. Mark's beginning on July 1st.  He will serve with Mary Beth Morgan...with whom I have served these past six years.  He happens to be the husband of Mary Beth Morgan...so that is nice...very nice.  For them and for the church.

Here is some of what I will say on my final day in the pulpit...as Times Change and Life Moves On:

Four Theological statements I believe are true…
-God Creates.
-God Loves.
-God Redeems.
-God Continues.

Four Real-Life statements I believe are true…
-We ought to take into account who others are, and what others do, and think, and believe. 
-Anyone not willing to risk is not really willing to live.
-We either get better or get worse…and its always the right thing to choose getting better.  
-Its important to find ourselves in harmony with God’s activity in the world.
 

I think my four Theological Beliefs

and my four Real-Life Beliefs
help make it possible for me to actually experience
whatever Most Excellent Harmonies God wants to send my way.

In my years here in Bloomington…at St. Mark’s Church…
I have more than once found myself wondering:

So…what-and-where…are those Most Excellent Harmonies that God deals in?
And my answers, today, are these:

I believe…We find God’s Most Excellent Harmonies in the unexpected Places where we least expect to find God.
And in those Places we just may find
the undeniable sense of the Holy that will catch our attention.

I believe…We find God’s Most Excellent Harmonies in the unexpected Times
when we would rather wallow around in the muddle and muck
and rehash old, unresolved issues.
And in those Times we just may find
God offering a new insight, a new direction, a new purpose.
I believe…We find God’s Most Excellent Harmonies in the unexpected
Situations that might seem trivial:
things like a passing comment,
a line from a movie, a face in a photograph, a shared cup of coffee…or bottle of beer.

And, I believe…We find God’s Most Excellent Harmonies even as
Times Change and Life Goes On.
We will find them in the Ministries of Jimmy Moore,
and Mary Beth Morgan,
and in the Congregation of St. Mark’s United Methodist Church.

What Tomorrow Holds...

Today I was invited by a group of teenage girls who are part of a pastry cooking class that has been meeting at St. Mark's over the past three days to join them in a Tea and Pastry Party in Garton Hall.  Real china to eat on and drink from...linen napkins...fancy presentations of all the many pastries they had made...and good conversation about what the girls would do with the rest of the summer.

One of the girls was going to spend time in a Swahili language class; another was going to San Francisco with grandparents to celebrate her 12th birthday; another would involved in softball and cheer-leading camps; another was traveling to take part in an ice-skating camp...what a wonderful lunch-time it was.  The chocolate eclairs were great!

And then there is Tomorrow.

Tomorrow is Thursday. The 11th of June, 2015.

If all goes well, I will wake up about 6:45 or 7:00 am, grab a Grande Non-Fat Latte at the Starbuck's drive-thru, and tee-off with my usual foursome at 8:15; I am scheduled to get daughter to summer school class at 1:00 pm, and then check-in at the office.

That's the plan.  It may or may not work out as listed above. 

Then again, Tomorrow could go completely off script and be filled with unexpected events and happenings.

Tomorrow could turn out like this:

Or, Tomorrow could wind up being like this:

Based on some Yesterdays, Tomorrow could be like this:

Its never easy to know what Tomorrow will hold in store...maybe something like this:

Or maybe...Tomorrow there will be another Tea Party!

More Than You Bargained For...

I grew up in a very small town about seven miles west of South Bend, in northern Indiana.

I was born in 1945.

In the 1950s and early '60s, when I was growing through childhood and my teen-age years, Lydick was the world I knew.

My parent's home was on a gravel road...as I remember, there were only two main paved roads in town: Edison and Quince.  There was a four-way stop where those two roads intersected.  No stop lights, no street lights, no police department.

Lydick had one grocery store, one gas station, one tavern, one Gleaner's Hall, one barber shop, one volunteer fire department, one grade school, one middle school (no high school...we went to New Carlisle for that adventure), one brick church, and one Ice Cream Parlor.

The Lydick Ice Cream Parlor served up hamburgers, french fries, soda fountain drinks...and great malts.  I loved the chocolate malts.

Those malts always arrived on the soda fountain counter just as pictured above.  A glass full of cold malted milk and ice cream...and more in the metal container in which the delicious drink was mixed.  How great is that?  More than enough.  More than you would expect.  More than you bargained for!

Fast forward.

I now live in Bloomington, in central southern Indiana.

I think every street in town is paved.  We have four-way stops, but we have way more stop lights...heck, we even got roundabouts.  There's not just one of anything...so far as I can tell.  Two institutions of higher learning, we got.

I eat lunch at 5 Guys probably once a week...on average.  I always order the same thing: Single hamburger (ketchup only), regular order of fries, and a small soft drink.

Look down into that bag.  That's how my lunch order at 5 Guys arrives.  See that container of fries?  And do you also see all the other fries that come with the order but will not fit into the paper cup designed to hold the fries?  How great is that?  More than enough.  More than you would expect.  More than you bargained for!

Truth is like that, I think.  Love is like that, I think.  And God is like that, I think.

Like those malts served up at the Lydick Ice Cream Parlor. And like those fries served up at 5 Guys.

There's always more to truth, and love, and God than fits neatly into a single container.  There's always truth, and love, and God that spills over and needs more space than what is allotted.

Anybody...or any group...or any institution...serving up "all there is to know" about truth...about love...about God...ain't worth your time. 

Hold out for the people, groups, or institutions that offer up servings like the ones in the pictures above.